Day Nine

 It’s been a while. I don’t even know how many days have passed since my last entry, but it’s been a bit crazy here. A rival group found our wooded base and tried to come to steal our supplies when they thought we weren’t home, but we managed to kill them. It sounds so harsh that we murdered them but that was the way the world worked now. It was a kill or be killed situation and we had to kill to protect the medicine that I literally couldn’t live without. Sam’s bite from that human a while ago had gotten infected, almost lost Sam, but we found antibiotics that weren’t expired, and that saved Sam. It was a close call though. I was worried because if we lost Sam Doc would have to do all the runs by himself and that was horrifying to think about; especially if Sam reanimated.

Another strange turn of events is that we found a child wandering the streets crying. They were attracting zombies to us, but we couldn’t let a child be killed so Sam and Doc made the decision to rescue her. She’s been a drain on our food supplies, but the hunting is still going okay so we’re not too worried yet. Besides, I don’t think any of us could’ve lived with ourselves if we had let a little girl die. She’s been fun to have around too, something that lightens the air around us and adds a bit of joy to our otherwise miserable lives.

In some more awful news, Doc thinks that I’m running out of time with how much we can find the medication. He had sat me down a couple of days ago and said that we couldn’t keep going so far out because that attracts more humans and more zombies to our base. I understand where he’s coming from and I told him if I get to that point that I can’t do anything he can end it if he must. Doc freaked out when I said that because he didn’t want to kill a living human being that didn’t do anything, but he would have to if I’m in so much pain I can’t even move or if I get sick. It’s a scary situation to think about but I’ll do what I must to protect the other 3 healthy people in my group and that includes dying when I’m a burden on them. I tried talking to them more about it but neither of them wanted to hear it and Delilah, the child, started freaking out when she thought I was going away.

I hope that they realize that eventually, I will become a burden that they can’t take care of anymore and I don’t want that to happen. I knew from the beginning that I was a burden and that’s why I left in the first place, or at least one of the reasons. I didn’t want my illness and my injuries to become the center of everyone’s focus instead of their own survival that they need to be worried about. Now that Delilah is here, Doc and Sam need to focus on her and not me, but they just won’t listen and it’s the most frustrating thing that’s happened since my last entry. Look at me I’m ranting now; I need to finish up this entry and head to make Delilah something to eat. I guess that’s all that’s really happened of major interest for now so I’m going to sign off until the next time something good happens.